So…..this post was meant for yesterday but it was one of those days that, before I knew it, was over, so happy Tuesday I guess? I’m not a fan when that happens, even though yes Mondays blow. But losing track of time shouldn’t be celebrated! Bad habits, people. Bad habits.

Since I’ve been working like a Lulu energizer bunny, mostly afternoon/night shifts, my whole schedule has been off. I, like many of you I assume, am a morning person. I’d MUCH rather wake up at 5:00am and be done by 3:00 or 4:00 than start in the afternoon and have my work go into the nighttime. I know technically it shouldn’t affect me, but I definitely turn into a slug if I have the option of sleeping in, even until 9:00am. I hope that scheduling gets a little less crazy soon so I’ll feel comfortable requesting more morning shifts, but until then, coffee shall run through my veins.

I’ve been slowly working my way back on the running train, which has been awesome because it’s been a comfortable 70 degrees and sunny in the mornings here. Perfect weather to get your sweat on. Plus, you can’t beat the views.

Again, I’m not anywhere near where I used to be, but I just keep on keeping on, and I know one day I’ll be back.

I spent a hilarious amount of time in the back of a convertible this weekend while my parents drove around – I felt like a celeb and a prisoner of war at the same time. So much wind.

Oh and feel free to ignore the adult acne. Yes, kids, acne does not go away once you hit your 20s. Don’t believe the lies.

And in case I couldn’t get any more predictable, I’ve been eating the same thing for lunch every day. Granted, it’s amazing and you should definitely take notes, but I think I need to hit up Pinterest for some new ideas because I know this is going to get old fast.

Chopped peppers (underneath) mixed with black and white beans, cumin, TJ’s corn and chili salsa, half an avocado and TJ’s cilantro salad dressing. After I took the picture I mixed it all up and it’s seriously killer. Plus it travels well so it’s perfect to make in the morning, throw in some tupperware and keep for later (keeping the avocado on the side, of course). Convenient and tasty.

I also Instagrammed this photo a few days ago and just had to share again because it was THAT good. For the first time in the history of my life, the sandwich out-shined the fries.

This bad boy was stuffed with grilled chicken, Monterey Jack cheese, BBQ sauce, mustard-honey, red onion, coleslaw, and arugula.

Last food photo, I promise.

It’s time to become accountable: these have become my best friend at night. There’s something a little TOO comforting about Netflix and chocolate in bed. Definitely a bad habit and something I need to work on.

I bought them as my sweet of choice because a) the almonds at least make them more satisfying and b) there are milk and dark chocolate pieces intermixed, so it’s a 50/50 chance that it’s a healthy choice. Still, finishing THAT much of the container in only a few days isn’t something to be proud of so I’ll have to work on it.

Back in the day I remember it was a nightly ritual to eat dessert in bed…usually in the form of York peppermint patties or bowls of cereal. Emphasis on the plural. So it’s a habit that’s long been a source of comfort for me, but really shouldn’t.

I keep trying to tell myself to turn off the computer and do a little yoga before bed, but to be honest, that’s been a huge struggle for me. As in, it’s not happening. It’s a lot easier during the day and at work to pretend like everything’s okay, but once it’s just me alone at night, I quickly try to distract myself to avoid the stress and anxiety from my current situation. I know I’m not alone in that coping mechanism, but hopefully one day soon I’ll have the courage to stay still, be quiet, and face my anxiety. One thing I’m learning in therapy is the more I fight my anxiety, the stronger it becomes (kind of like a game of tug-of-war). I don’t want to give it any more power, so fingers crossed I can face it when it hits me the hardest.

Questions:

• What’s your worst eating habit? (Late night eating, uncontrollable snacking, skipping meals)
• Is it easy for you to fall asleep at night or do you have a ritual that makes it easier?
• Are you a morning person or a night owl?

Since I left the 9-5 world of public relations I’ve found myself wondering if I’d ever feel like I was on “a path” again. I know that’s a terrible way of looking at life, especially because life is what happens when you aren’t trying to forge a path and “figure things out” (amiright?) But since I finally feel like I have a handle on where my life is going, I’d love to share it with you all. After all, you guys have been the BEST lately. For real. Never in a million years did I think that people who I’d never physically met before could be so supportive. This blog has truly been a gift to me for the past year.

So what am I up to?

I have officially begun the NASM program to become a certified personal trainer!

For the past few years I’ve felt this pull to help people through fitness. I’ve always known that I wouldn’t be happy in life if I wasn’t making a difference somehow. When I was 15 I was convinced I would join the Peace Corps and in college I thought I’d become a journalist to help educate people about the injustices that happen every day in our country and around the globe. But ever since I discovered my passion for fitness and health I’ve realized that the “change” I want to make doesn’t have to be on a huge scale.

Six months ago I was on the elliptical at my then-gym and I watched as a timid, overweight, middle-aged woman met her personal trainer for the first time, a mid-20s fitness buff whose muscles were bursting out of his frat tank with the gym’s name written all over it like a walking ad. I remember watching their interaction and seeing how he barely looked at her, just trotted her over to the scale, asked her to step on, wrote it down, and walked away. The look on her face…..I just remember thinking: this woman is trapped. She wants to be healthy, she wants a support system, a friend, a health confidante, someone with some goddamn empathy, and all she got was a “trainer” who saw her as another number.

I am lucky enough that I discovered the benefits of an active life early: you have more confidence, you feel like there is nothing holding you back from any physical activity (want to hike up that mountain? no problem!), you are inspired to cook healthy and colorful meals, and you don’t turn down social activities because you’re anxious about how you appear to other people and you don’t want a little extra weight to define you. I want to share that with other people. I want to become a personal trainer, develop relationships with clients, and then, eventually, teach group fitness classes. I know that not only will I feel great by helping people, but this will help my confidence as well.

I should have my certification by Thanksgiving, and then I’ll start looking for opportunities in the city.  I thrive on relationships so I can’t wait to get started and see where this new path takes me!

On that note, studying doesn’t pay the bills, so what am I doing in the meantime?

I work at lululemon athletica! I began training over a month ago and am officially an Educator!

I can already tell this is going to be an incredible place to work. Everyone has the same passion for health that I do and I’ve already attended a bunch of new fitness classes that I would never have tried on my own! It’s like I just made dozens of new friends who are exactly like me 🙂

Another huge plus is that the company promotes personal development in employees, so over the past month I’ve been forced (yes, forced) to look at my life and create a vision for my future. Not a general “I want to be happy.” I actually had to write out specific goals that I want to accomplish in 1 year, 5 years, 10 years, etc. and share the vision I have for my life.

It. Was. Hard. I’m not a future-thinker. The future scares me. But once I had everything written out, I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. I feel in control of my future, and I know that my vision can come true if I hold myself accountable to all my goals.

So many changes are a-happening but in the midst of all the change is an underlying excitement! I can’t wait to share everything with you over the next few months.

Questions:

• Any certified personal trainers out there? Any tips for me?
• Are you a future-thinker? Do you have specific goals for the future that you hold yourself accountable for?

It’s safe to say that we don’t always have time to make a nice breakfast in the morning. Whenever I have even fifteen minutes to spare I love to make a big omelet or bowl of oatmeal, but there are days when there’s just not enough time. But you can’t skip breakfast – you just can’t. Whenever I skip breakfast one of two things happens:

1. I get a caffeine high and feel jittery within an hour, making me not-so-pleasant to be around.(Because even when I miss breakfast I NEVER skip coffee).
2. I get extrememly hungry and can’t focus until I get my hands on the closest 3,000 snacks in the vicinity, making me no-so-pleasant to be around.

So in an effort to make sure I’m always pleasant to be around, I like to have breakfast options on hand. Whether it be preparing overnight oats the night before or chopping veggies ahead of time so I can scramble them up with eggs in a matter of minutes, I’m always thinking ahead to the first meal of the day. Well, all meals, actually, but that’s besides the point…

If you’re looking for a quick grab-and-go breakfast that isn’t a granola bar, look no further. Plus, they’re almost too easy to make. So no excuses, people.

Mini Broccoli Cheddar Frittatas

(Makes 12 mini frittatas)

Ingredients

• 6 eggs
• 6 egg whites
• 2 cups cooked broccoli, chopped
• 1 cup onion, chopped
• 1 cup cheddar cheese
• 1/4 cup unsweetened almond milk
• 1 teaspoon onion powder
• Salt/pepper to taste

Combine all the ingredients and pour into a muffin tin (use cooking spray so they don’t stick). Bake in a 350 degree oven for 20-22 minutes. Leave in the muffin tin to cool. They will continue to cook once they’re out of the oven so don’t worry if they’re not golden on top. That usually means they’ve been overcooked (think about it – who eats a golden brown omelet?)

Terrible photography aside, these are great 🙂 Enjoy!

 PS: Follow me on Instagram for more foodie pics and so I can follow your adventures too!

Happy Monday! I worked a lot this past weekend so I’d be lying if I didn’t say that some of these pictures were from the end of last week. But regardless, the weather is finally cooperating, making it officially summer in Chicago! (Sidenote: no matter the weather, someone around me is ALWAYS complaining. First it’s too cold and everyone’s like, “where’s summer?” and now everyone is complaining about the heat. At what point do people just STFU and enjoy the day?) All I know is, when it’s light out until 8:30pm and the whole city is out playing softball and drinking beer on a Wednesday night, I’m happy.

PS if you are good at something in fifth grade and try again when you’re 23, you most likely will suck at it. But it was a blast!

The highlight of my weekend was a run that I absolutely crushed! I felt like my old self again and it was a fabulous run (minus a bug flying into my eye).

I’ve also been doing a bomb job of sneaking veggies into things every which way, so thumbs up all around!

I also tried a Flywheel class for the first time and absolutely LOVED it. The instructor was so passionate about what she was doing and really gave 100% to the class. That always makes or breaks classes for me, and a reason why I can’t wait to be an instructor one day. Someone needs to share the kool-aid with me that makes them so peppy, though, because even after a few cups of coffee I can’t pull off that level of cheer. Something to work on 🙂 I’ve done spin classes before but this was my first experience with cycle shoes. Luckily pretending I knew what I was doing worked this time around and I didn’t look like a total goober. The best part was a song she played…it was a mashup of “I Want It That Way” (BSB) and “I Could Be The One” (Nicky Romero) – if anyone has any idea what I’m talking about send it my way because I haven’t had any luck finding it!

I’m also pretty sure I’ve become too comfortable at Starbucks. Their soy iced coffee + spinach/feta wrap happens at least two times a week and my wallet isn’t happy. But my stomach is, and in the battle of Hunger vs. Wallet, hunger always wins.

In case this post hasn’t been random enough for you all, I can’t leave without including best thing(s) I ate all weekend.

On Friday a few friends and I went out for dinner and drinks. I mentioned last week that I’ve been on an Office-watching bender, and ever since I saw the episode where they went to Benihana, it’s been on my mind. I’ve been craving Japanese food like crazy, especially since it’s not something I eat very often. So on Friday night I managed to convince some of my girlfriends to meet up there.

Terriyaki chicken never. gets. old. So sweet, so buttery, so delicious. The zin tasted like church wine, though, so I think I’ll be trying something else next time.  I love hibachi grills because the whole meal is a production, with separate courses and communal eating. Not enough of that happens these days.

After dinner we went to a local martini bar for a few drinks. I have never had a dessert martini before so I quickly decided on a Vanilla Cake martini that dreams are made of.

I followed it up with a Key Lime martini, which I closed my eyes and pretended was this:

Totally the same thing, right? 🙂

All in all, a wonderful night with my girlfriends that felt like we were starring in a suburban version of Sex and the City.

If you stuck around for this whole post, you’re a trooper.

Questions:

• Have you ever been to a hibachi grill? Do you like those types of restaurants?
• If you were a Sex and the City character, who would you be? (I’m definitely half Charlotte, half Carrie)
• Have you ever gone to Flywheel before? What did you think?

 

 

 

 

You guys…you’re lucky I like and trust you because you are about to hear some embarrassing confessions. I’m a firm believer that until you look at yourself in the mirror and admit your feelings, you can’t move forward, so I’m going to bear it all (AND throw in some funny ones just so you know my life isn’t a complete clusterf***).

Confession #1

I quit PR.

Okay well I didn’t quit so much as I decided I didn’t want to keep looking for a permanent position in it. I didn’t love it. I woke up every morning fine with what I was doing but I couldn’t shake the feeling that “fine” wasn’t good enough. It took every ounce of courage I had but I took some advice from my old friend Ralph and am trying to forge my own path.

 So where am I going, what am I doing? I promise I’ll let you know soon, just as soon as I get into my new routine. But I’m excited!

Confession #2

5 weeks ago I moved back home. I’m now living in the suburbs with my family until I can save some money and get my life back on track. Without getting into too much detail, I need to take care of myself right now and moving home where I don’t have to worry about the “big” stuff might seem immature to some but to me it was my only option.  A few months ago I started having pretty debilitating panic attacks, something I had never experienced before. I don’t know where they came from and I don’t know why they’ve started running my life, but they started to physically ruin my days and make living my “normal” life impossible. So I did the only thing I thought I could do–I moved home, am talking through my life to a third-party (is there a non-awkward way to say shrink?), and am switching jobs. So to say it’s a bit of a whirlwind time in my life is an understatement. I have hope for the future, but right now I’m taking everything day by day.

Confession #3

Ok let’s take a breath after all that heaviness.

Nine out of ten times I crave Mexican food solely for the margaritas – the food itself is no bueno.

Now, there are exceptions, and I’ve had a MEAN fish taco. But I think it’s time to  admit to myself that when I suggest a good fiesta I’m really just jonesing for a monster margarita. I finally admitted this to myself when I popped into Flaco’s Tacos for lunch on my last day Friday and pretty much hated my meal. No chips and salsa or tequila take ALL the fun out of Mexican food.

 

Confession #4

Since “everything” happened, I have stopped working out. I’ve gone through all the stages: I’ve grieved, felt sorry for myself, wallowed, and cried, and started the cycle all over again. I’ve lost 8 pounds–ALL muscle, everything I’ve worked hard to build up for the past year. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned from therapy so far it’s that feeling guilty about the past and fearing the future are only going to fuel my anxiety and cripple me from existing in the present. I’ve already wasted five weeks of my life and I decided that today would be a new start. So this morning I set out on a run – 3 miles. Nothing, right? Well, have you ever taken five weeks off from exercise completely? Those 3 miles, which would normally take around 26 minutes, took me 51 minutes. Between walking breaks and feeling like my heart was going to burst out of my chest, it took 51 minutes. See how this is a confession? That’s embarrassing for someone who claims to be a fitness lover! It was another reason why I didn’t want to start blogging again. I felt like such a fraud. But I’m trying to show myself a little compassion and remind myself that I’m going to need to build back up. And I’m never going to build back up if I stay at zero.

Confession #5

I’ve watched more Netflix in the past week than should be legal.

I started rewatching The Office and got completely sucked in. I’m a little ashamed at how many hours I’ve spent laughing at Michael Scott but it’s been A LOT. I guess there are worse ways to spend your time, right? 

Confession #6

At some point in the future I’ve decided that I want to learn how to design tablescapes. No, that doesn’t make me a housewife wannabe, but some of the beautiful designs I see on Pinterest take my breath away. I have fantasies of one day throwing a beautiful dinner party complete with great friends, fancy hor d’oeuvres, a breathtaking table and great wine. Even typing that it sounds laaame but I have to admit it’s a fantasy of mine.

Confession #7

I can’t stop listening to this song. It gets me out of my own head.

Confession #8

I love you all so much. Your comments on my post last week brought me to tears and really made me excited to start writing again. And you were right–the writing is proving to be very therapeutic for me. So, as always, thanks for reading and commenting– I value this community more and more every day.

 

Every year the city gears up for the Taste of Chicago, an outdoor food festival showcasing the diversity of Chicago’s dining community. Besides showcasing food from all corners of the city, the Taste is complemented by music and other activities for the entire family. It’s a beautiful celebration that has happened annually in Grant Park since 1980, and while it’s a bit of a tourist trap (to put it lightly), this was my first time living in the city AND being a major foodie so I knew I had to at least stop by.

Zain and I arrived after work to a semi-crowded festival. That’s my first tip for Taste-goers: do not try to go on Saturday afternoon. I love food but I also love personal space and if you don’t want the person next to you breathing on your empanadas, go during the week.

Tickets aren’t cheap but they’re not absurdly priced either. They come in packs of 12 for $8.50, with “tastes” (or sample sizes) from each restaurant being anywhere from 3-5 tickets and meals being 6-10 or so. Zain and I each got two 12-packs and it ended up being the perfect amount.

We got a few “tastes” and a few star items, and left the festival feeling stuffed. We also heard AWOLNATION playing in the park next to the festival. That’s one of my favorite parts of Chicago – there’s no shortage of great entertainment, even when you’re just walking the street eating a turkey leg after work on a Wednesday.

• The Savoy – Grilled Shrimp Po Boy
• Churro Factory – Funnel Cake with Strawberry Sauce
• Manny’s Coffee Shop – BBQ Turkey Leg
• Abbey Pub & Restaurant – Roasted Corn on the Cob
• Mayan Sol Latin Grill – Empanadas Colombianas (chicken)
• Brasserie by LM – Croque Monsieur Sandwich (Ham, Swiss, Bechamel, Dijon)

The Good: the grilled shrimp po boy, croque monsieur, and the corn on the cob

The Bad: empanadas (tasteless)

The Eh: bbq turkey leg and funnel cake (they smelled better than they tasted and not worth the $$)

What I wish I had tried:

• Robinson’s No. 1 Ribs – chicken tenders and rib tips. The smell alone made me swoon.
• The Savoy – crab cake. It was between the crab cake and the po boy so I went with what the girl working there said. I loved the po boy so I can only imagine how great the crab cake would be!
• Carbon Live Fire Mexican Grill – Tortilla Encrusted Tilapia Taco OR the tamale

That’s the thing about the Taste – you can’t possible try it all in one day (unless you’re a competitive eater). I left feeling stuffed out of my mind even though I’m sure if I sat down for a proper dinner I would have eaten more than I did here. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to go twice to really try a lot of options. It wasn’t a steal, as we ended up spending $34 for all the food you see above, and it’s difficult to use exactly the number of tickets you buy. We ended up giving our two leftover tickets to a homeless man collecting extras because you can’t really buy anything with two tickets. I’m sure at the end of the day he had enough for a decently sized meal which was a good feeling. Overall, it was a gorgeous 75 degree day filled with food sampling, music and good company, so how could I complain?

We ended the night taking a walk through Millennium Park just as a jazz band started playing. I’ll tell you what…this city has its problems but it has some gorgeous parks and great free activities.

Questions:

• Does your city/town have a food festival like this?
• Which of these items are you dying to try?

There’s something about classic 90s hits that really keeps a smile on my face during the workday. A few weeks back I went to see a 90s cover band and I honestly can’t tell you the last time I had that much fun! Growing up I was really into Hanson and Savage Garden, but for some reason I missed out on most of the cult classics from Blink 182 and Dave Matthews and all that. Luckily, thanks to modern technology, I can go back and relive the glory days anytime I want, and I don’t even have to have a cassette tape ready to go to record a song when it comes on the radio (those were the days, huh?)

I’ve been putting together a 90s playlist and realized that I have to be missing some! So, in the spirit of Throwback Thursday I have to ask…what are your favorite 90s songs? Comment below!

In the meantime, here’s the throwback you didn’t even know you needed, but will now thank me for:

And of course my favorite:

You’re welcome 🙂 Now tell me your favorites!

Isn’t it funny how easy those words come off the tongue but the minute your life turns upside down you can’t believe it for yourself?

To be honest I have no idea how to write this post. I haven’t wanted to write or even thought I was able to, but I think just writing, even if it’s about nothing, will help.
I’ll admit it –whenever one of my regular bloggers falls off the map I find myself increasingly curious as each day passes by. Did someone die? Did he/she get kidnapped?? Are they living on a desert island??? And while I don’t consider myself a blogger that anyone in particular would be “worried” about, I figured I owed an explanation. One Wednesday I left you with some fun food pictures and a “see you tomorrow” and then I disappear for a month.

There’s not much to say except I’m going through a rough patch right now. As most people know, your first few years after college are hard, but for some reason my mind and body just aren’t handling it well at all. I’ve tried to force myself to be happy and grateful, because I know that that’s the key to a fulfilled life. But even though I’ve easily lived a life full of sunshine thus far, the past six months I have felt like a black cloud is slowly and quietly taking over my life. Worry, fear and guilt have consumed me and as hard as I’ve fought them off, they’ve won for now. I know I’ll be better eventually and am taking all the right steps to get back to my happy self, but for now this is where I’m at.

I didn’t think I could write until things went back to “normal,” but I’m slowly realizing that standing still (metaphorically) won’t get me anywhere, especially back to my old “normal.” Who knows if that normal will ever be back. But one thing is for sure – writing, especially in this forum, is one of the things in life that brings me the most happiness. So for now I’m going to play the old “fake it ‘til you make it”. I’m going to share food photos, maybe with fewer words than normal, and I’m definitely not going to get creative with topics. I apologize in advance  I’m just going to sit down every once in a while and write.

Thanks in advance for the kindness I know I’m going to receive from this community. Like I said, please bear with me. But for now, I have about a month’s worth of blog-reading to do!