Thinking Out Loud: franken fraps and waterboarding


It’s been a hot minute since I’ve shared the random ramblings that go on inside this (oversized) noggin of mine, so let’s just jump right in.

1) Let’s set the mood. I couldn’t pick between these three songs so you get ’em all:

2) I woke up at the crack of dawn this morning, determined to hit 6 miles before the majority of people would see me dying on the side of the road on their way to work. It was freezing. Winter is coming, Chicago. I’m here to tell you.

unnamed (25)

Lucky for me cold weather running is my jam and I made that six miles my b***h 😀

3) I am incapable of washing my face and not making a mess. A total mess. I get water like two feet from the sink, get mascara all over my towels and go to bed with facewash in my ears. IN MY EARS. Did I just not learn how to wash my face right? Was this a lesson they gave while I was in speech therapy? It gives me anxiety when I stay over at someone else’s place because a) why is everyone’s sink so small?! and b) where in the world does their mascara go?! Clearly not on the pristine white hand towels that everyone seems to have.


4) Speaking of speech therapy, fun fact: I had a speech impediment growing up. I sound like a normal human these days but back then S’s were tricky and I couldn’t for the life of me say the letter R. That was a real treat because my name has an R in it. I even called my aunt rich once and hurt her feelings, having just been called a “witch” by her niece. The word “world” is still tricky for me to say to this day. So let’s just say I’ll never be writing a novel called “The World According to Lauren.”

5) I realized after spending lots of time reading all your blogs and commenting yesterday, that I included the word “literally” in, literally, every comment. Guys I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. Things were getting real literal in the blog world, apparently.


6) I haven’t had wine in a full week. That’s SEVEN MOONS’ TIME. Funny how six months ago I didn’t touch wine – but when I was dealing with all that ish this past summer wine became my best friend. Weird how I now notice the time I DON’T have a wine glass in my hand, and not the other way around.


7) I had a sleepover the other night. At a personal chef’s house. I came home from work and this was waiting for me in the fridge:

unnamed (26)A beautiful Greek salad with my NAME written on it. I felt like the queen of England. I need to continue to make friends with like this. These are my people. They just get me.

8) I can’t wait for Halloween. Scratch that – I can’t wait for Halloween 2020. When I’m a a real adult and can throw real holiday parties where people send out cute Etsy invites three weeks ahead of time and people actually RSVP and you make six hundred adorable Pinterest-inspired apps and have costume contests. Right now is not a good time to be a holiday lover. 50% of people my age want to dress up as a slutty minion from Despicable Me and the other 50% don’t want to do anything. Not a fan of this middle ground. I want apple bobbing and beer tasting, eating donuts that are hanging on strings from the tree in my front yard and handing out candy to kids when they ring the doorbell. So basically I want my Halloween to be straight out of an episode of 7th Heaven.

9) Speaking of Hallween did you all see this??


The limited-edition Franken Frappuccino is a Green Tea Frappuccino with peppermint syrup, white chocolate sauce, java chips and topped with whipped cream and mocha drizzle. To celebrate the spooky holiday Starbucks is serving these creations for $3 for a grande after 2 p.m. today and tomorrow. I’ve never been a huge frappuccino fan but in the spirit of the holidays I’m definitely going to get one. I’ll let you all know how it goes!

10) I decided to make some money on the side by participating in focus groups in Chicago. Well I’ve been at it for two days now and I am officially qualified for ZERO focus groups. So…either I’m an awesome/unique individual whose life just can’t be quantified, or I’m a loser.

That was a LOT of rambling. If you made it to the bottom I’ve officially succeeded as a blogger, as I’ve kept you entertained longer than a standard YouTube video. My work here is literally done!


  • Are you a holiday lover? Do you throw any cool parties for any specific holiday?
  • Will you try the Franken Frap?
  • Anyone else make a complete mess whenever they wash their face?
  • Any fellow speech class peeps?


  1. Focus groups–you’re just unique! Nothing wrong with that. 😉 As for the Halloween parties, can you sign me up on your invite list?! I agree with everything you said about there being no middle ground. I want to bite donuts hanging off of strings off trees too!

  2. Hahahaha all the yes to this post 😀 And all the internet points for including a rachel zoe gif!! she’s ah-MAZ-ing. I did focus groups when i first moved to nyc- don’t worry you’ll get some, they’re actually kinda fun! And i havent even heard of the franken frap- where are my priorities?

  3. That frap sounds soooo gross. Too much…stuff going on!
    Rachel Zoe would literally die. Because it is BANANAS.
    I think that I am Alex’s live in private chef. Scratch that, I know it to be true. Dammit. I need a raise.

    1. You totally are Alex’s private chef hahaha you should strike for higher wages! I’m going to give that frap a try…hopefully they have a short size, not just “tall” because I’m pretty sure I can’t handle more than that haha

  4. Lol about the focus groups. I legit thought about doing those in college but… then I didn’t. Maybe I assumed they wouldn’t pick me because I’m uninteresting. Oh, and I literally say literally all the time. It’s a problem.

  5. Thanks for sharing that Imagine Dragon song. I had no clue they had new stuff out – must go to iTunes more.

    I’ll be in Chicago for work this weekend and was looking at the weather…what the heck winter?? Excuse me as I stay in my hotel room in my snuggle with a few glasses of wine and Netflix.

    1. Wooooo! You’re coming exactly when the weather is changing to pure crap! haha I’m so sorry! And I wouldn’t have had any idea about the ID song either but Spotify sends me updates when artists I like put out new music so I was so happy to hear this one too!

  6. I also hate washing my face because I make a huge mess! And, even worse, I am very short (I’m not sure if this happens to people who aren’t short, I just assume it doesn’t) so the water like runs down to my elbows and gets my arms and shirt all wet! Its the worst. and THAT’S why I switched to nice makeup removing/ face cleansing WIPES! HORRAAY for modern inventions. Have a lovely day!! 🙂

  7. I’m loving Rollercoaster! The Rachel Zoe meme made me laugh! She literally says literally all the time!

    So this is embarrassing but ever since my belly got really big, I can’t really lean over the sink properly to wash my face. I end up doing this weird tip toe lunge thing and I get water everywhere! My face hasn’t been really cleaned properly in a long time. I’ve taken to using wipes and then washing my face. Oy!

  8. Wait…what are these focus groups and how do I become part of one? I want to be paid for being myself! Haha.

    Oh gosh, I make SUCH a mess when I wash my face. I think I’d need a trough for a sink in order to keep from splashing water everywhere. Though eye makeup remover does a great job of solving the mascara problem!

  9. Your literally is my definitely — I use that in WAY too many of my comments, because apparently I really need the point to hit home. And omg YES to making a complete mess of the bathroom whenever I wash my face! I need one face cloth to dry my actual face, and one to dry my sink because dirty sinks really skeeve me out 😯

  10. So many thoughts on this post. First, I love that you tried to help set the mood with music. I think about doing that all the time, but I never do cause I can’t decide on a song.

    Second, I can only wash my face in the shower because I make such a mess. Yes, this means I sleep in my makeup almost every night (which I’m not “supposed” to do), but it’s the only way to keep from having to mop my bathroom every day.

    Third, how have you made it so long without wine? Please share your secret.

    1. Thanks! It reminds me of a myspace page a little haha how when you first arrived at someones page a song would play. I think people’s taste in music says a lot about them! If i didnt wash my makeup off i think my skin would officially rebel against me haha it already hates me enough

  11. These are my favorite types of posts to read! Literally 😉 Haha, I’m also all about that word! And holidays. Oh my gosh, once we are out of an apartment, in a house, and don’t have dogs going crazy every time someone comes over, I will be all about hosting! Love holidays, love get togethers.

  12. Way to make that run your b**ch! Not sure how your a fan of running in cold weather, but hey more power to ya! Guess you almost have to be cool w/ it since you live in Chicago, huh? Haha!

  13. I literally loved this post 😉

    Congratulations on making those 6 miles your b*tch! I enjoy winter running too provided it isn’t really windy! Rain I can handle but not wind.

    I have strong opinions on peppermint and chocolate never being combined so needless to say I won’t be trying a Franken Frap. Although here in Australia pretty sure we don’t have them anyway.

  14. Even though I never get frappachinos that Franken one looks like fun! Seen as we don’t even have a green tea frappachino here I doubt I will find one! Ha the usual!
    I crave an American Halloween! We could dress up, Apple Bob and go trick or treating together! 🙂 I really need to come visit!

  15. I couldn’t agree MORE with you about the whole “limbo” thing with age…either friends want to still act as if they’re in college or they don’t want to do anything. I’m with you, I want cute pinterest ideas, and DEFF knowing I have a planned party. Not a last minute “come to my basement” invite at 7pm the night of! As for your chef friend, JEALOUS 🙂 i love the holidays 🙂

  16. I love the holidays,specially X-mas! I would love to try the Franken frappachino since i always find myself getting an iced caramel machiato! can’t belive you like to run in the winter, i give you props for that.

  17. haha your face washing fail is cracking me up. i’d be a mascara mess if i didn’t use eye makeup remover — not your thing, darling? it’s a must for me. won’t be trying the frap as it’s, like, totally hot coffee weather here in NYC, so you let us know how it goes. and then wiiiiineeee — i had some last night for the first time in, like a week and a half (i’m not counting champagne or mimosas in there, they’re totalllyyyy diff) and it was like falling in love all over again with something you didn’t realize you’d let go. OH oh oh and have you seen the HIMYM episode where they talk about Robin overusing the phrase “literally”? you’re in good company, toots. 🙂

    1. I almost picked a GIF from that HIMYM episode haha but I have a confession – I don’t like that show. At all. Haha I think I’m the only person on the planet who doesn’t! The makeup remover…I love it but I always skip it thinking it’s a waste of money. Then I spend $10 on something dumb like squash or something. Clearly I have my priorities

  18. The FrankenFrapp is insane. I am lucky enough to work in the morning which means most people that come at that time of day do not order them. I haven’t made a single one!! HA. BOOYA 6miler!

  19. I’ve never had a Franken frapp but I didn’t even know it would be that cheap after two pm!

    Apparently, you could customize your own drink simply by bringing in your own candy bars and asking them to blend it in your trap. 🙂

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