We’ve all heard the song (which you should definitely play while you read this post):
And since the #1 romance I have in my life is food, I figured I’d share my take:
I know I’m not the only one…
Who Doesn’t Like To Share Food
If I spend an hour making dinner after you’ve heated up your Ramen noodles, NO, you can’t have a bite. No, no, nope. Just, no.
Who studies menus online
I always look at menus before I go to a new restaurant so I don’t panic about all the choices once I’m there. Because heaven forbid I pick a dish that didn’t get rave Yelp reviews.
Who wants to get just drunk enough to press “Purchase” on a $300 dutch oven from Sur La Table
But…but…but…they’re just so beautiful. And think how many roux I can make with it.
Who completely understands food wrath
I think I’m the only one who has true empathy for Ross in the Friends episode when someone “accidentally” eats his sandwich. If someone ate my sandwich out of the work fridge, I would totally go Kanye West on them.
Who has a deep-rooted desire to have serious knife skills
Because being able to cook isn’t enough. I want to prep like an Iron Chef.
Who can’t eat salad in the winter
I can’t remember the last time I ordered a salad. I love veggies — but a cold entree? Not gonna happen in the months of December-March. It’s just not.
Here’s the way I see it: salads need a blanket in the middle of winter just as much as I do. Therefore the burrito was born.
And it was good.
Who has a growing addiction to food porn
Are there programs for this? Between Pinterest, Instagram, and now Food Network news on Snapchat, getting basic daily tasks done has taken a backseat. Fine, I’ll say it: food is sexy.
I know I’m not the only one. ……Right?
i had a big lunch 
Ha ha! I love this post. First off let me say I love the song and video. Second I don’t mind sharing food( I think am the only one), I don’t eat salads in the winter either. Third I think food is sexy too, I’m with ya. Oh about you going kanye west if someone steals your lunch at work…hilarious! ( I would have laughed out loud but I kids are sleeping and definitely do not want to wake them up). 🙂
Haha thanks! Glad you can agree on the salad thang too 🙂
Hahaha. Salads in Winter are like punishment. Unless it;s a lettuce less salad and comprised of steak and potatoes.
Whenever I see friends/have meals out with them, I’m the annoying one who makes them all try something if it’s really good…or if they are over, chase them around the house with it to taste. Must be the Persian roots!
Salad punishment! So true!
Ok — if I’m with other foodies then I’m totally fine sharing, because it’s a give and take. But so many times people are jealous of what I make and then they want some. They don’t wanna work for good food 😉
Tee hee. I know I’m not the only one who eats a huge meal and feels hungry like an hour later.
But I do eat salads throughout the year because I love them.
That’s a good one! I should’ve done that too haha I’m hungry on the hour every hour, it seems.
Haha I love this. I totally look at menus online before I go. I need time to really think about it! Then I get to the restaurant and still can’t decide….
Hahaha you’re right sometimes it doesn’t even help. But if I don’t look beforehand my restaurant-goers would think I was nuts! It would take me an hour to decide!
You are definitely not the only one! I study menus intensely before I visit a restaurant and pretty much am ready to order immediately! And- yes on the knife skills! I saw an online class for the skills I’ve been meaning to do… one of these days!
I just signed up for a knife skills class actually 🙂 I’m pumped!
I am loving all the Friends references. I actually have it on in the background at the moment.
I always look at menus before I go out to eat – I like to know what I have to look forward to.
Friends clearly had lots of good food advice 🙂 that’s my go-to show at night. Especially now that it’s on Netflix!
haha this cracked me up. the un-foodie in me definitely can’t relate, but i love that you love food so much! i do like a good skinny chicken burrito, but i can’t give up the salads. i DO, however, check menus online before i go anywhere, because i’m always the picky one. but i love to share my food! weird, i know. i’m usually pushing it at everyone.
That seems to be the most popular habit — we’re all menu-studiers, apparently! And I don’t mind sharing food with other foodies but when I spend time making something, I put together a nice bowl/plate of it, and then sit down and am asked to share, NOPE!
I really don’t like to share food, even with my husband (he inevitably gets more of it than me because he eats faster). Its just uncomfortable because you have to worry about if you have eaten more than your allotted amount.
And YES to studying menus online! Its way better to be prepared when going out to eat, otherwise it would take me hours to decide at the restaurant.
Thanks for agreeing on the sharing food thing! I was starting to feel like a monster 😉 just kidding but it’s definitely an uncomfortable situation if you ask me!
What’s wrong with a salad in winter? Haha! However, I couldn’t have one today, not after that cookie and mac & cheese. I need a minute.
Ok I’m good.
It’s just not comforting! Winter is when I start to roast every veggie on the planet – raw veggies rarely happen. I’m glad you could recover after the food porn – it can be pretty intense
Ahhh!! You are so funny!! Oh my gosh, those lovely pots though! WHY do they have to be so expensive?!! 🙂
Right?! Are there gold flecks in there?
I always want salad, but in the winter I am definitely more of a warm soup/veggie person. That being said, I just bought a salad on the way home. Im going to force myself to eat it.
My knife skills used to be atrocious but now I would say they are mediocre. Blue Apron actually helped improve mine bc they require a lot of chopping to prep the meal.
Veggie based soups are amazing this time of year 🙂 I’m actually heading to the Chopping Block this weekend for a knife skills class I can’t wait!
I’m all about menu studying online before going to a restaurant. It gets me so excited about wherever I’m going out to eat!
I do eat plenty of salads in the winter, though. Gotta convince myself to get veggies in somehow.
It gets me excited too, actually! And I still eat veggies but they mostly come in roasted form these days – not too many raw ones in my life. I really crave hot foods!
Definitely not the only one! I study food menus too like it is my job. Glad we are on the same page 🙂
I knew I wasn’t the only one 🙂
I could list menu reading and cookbook reading as hobbies. I own so many cookbooks. Do I use them? Of course not. But I love to read them!
Hahahaha cookbooks, Pinterest, it’s all the same. I love looking at them, but I never cook ANYTHING from them. I laughed out loud reading this comment haha cuz it’s so true!
Hahah this post is AWESOME! You are not the only one 🙂 my boyfriend makes fun of me and my lack of sharing desserts at the table…oops?
Sharing is caring………sometimes. 😉
OMG I say the same thing about wraps! My friend made a great salad the other day and I asked her to make it for me…and then I wrapped it in a tortilla. She thought I was nuts…I asked her for some guacamole! 🙂
Hahaha it’s true though, right? Sometimes you just gotta wrap it up! It feels so much more satisfying and filling that way. Also guac is ALWAYS a good idea 🙂
Oh you are brilliant, Lauren. You really do come up with witty and great blog posts! I feel ya on the studying of the menus before you go out to eat. Especially if it’s a new restaurant. I look up pictures of dishes from the restaurant as well just to get an idea of portion sizes and know what kinds of foods I’m looking at….Yeah. I know I’m not the only one.
Oh, and I don’t order salads out at restaurants during colder months either! I do eat them at home. But that’s only because I keep my home nice and toasty, so I feel alright eating them.
Haha I’m glad this post was entertaining I was feeling some serious writer’s block last night and then this just came out. The photo section of Yelp is my best friend 🙂
Hell no you’re not the only one!! I stared at that chocolate chip cookie image for like 30 seconds hahaha I usually look at restaurant menus beforehand too, I love that episode of Friends (and have been watching old episodes at midnight a lot!), and also think that those ovens are so cute… though I’d have to be pretty drunk to drop $300 on one!
It’s mesmerizing, isn’t it? 🙂 Yeah I wonder how many glasses of wine I’ll have to have to purchase that pot…maybe I’ll start a fund? Put $20 a week into a jar until I have enough? haha. Or maybe I’ll just check out Overstock.com…….
I am with you on them all, apart from salads. Yup I am still eating salads in the cold! I have no desire for smoothies at the moment though – cold liquids make me freeze!
David has actually had to say to someone before ‘Jen doesn’t share food’! :-S
I’m currently sitting with a space heater at my feet so yeah…no salads are going to be happening anytime soon. I love that David has said that! haha at least he knows 🙂
I use to always put my name on food so no one would eat it. Even in my house…haha. I cannot eat salads either in the winter. I always crave comfort food or a warm bowl of soup.
I HAVE to put my name on stuff in my parents’ house otherwise my brother will eat it in a second! haha. I’m glad we’re on the same page about comfort food.
I LOVE FOOD!! I do I do I doooo!!! 🙂 I always look at menus before going to a restaurant!! I’m like obsessed with traveling and eating!! So fun to find hidden treasures!!! Yaaay you rock and I love that you love food!! Miss ya! XOXO
So happy to see you back around these parts! I missed you, sunshine! Traveling and eating would be the two best ways to spend life — can you imagine doing nothing BUT that? Paradise!!
DEAR GOD that mac and cheese…so effin sexy. And the cookie above it was simply perfect. My only romance is with food, so…I’m all about this post.
Mac and cheese is so sexy, right? I have a video on my phone of a mac and cheese casserole bubbling straight from the oven, and anytime I’m in a bad mood I can just watch it. Genius. I highly recommend it.
I will be registering for that Dutch Oven for SURE!
Jealous! If for some reason you accidentally get two, you know what to do 😉
I study menus online all the time before I go out to eat. I have to know what I want ahead of time! lol…otherwise, yes it takes me forever to make a decision.
Also, I can only DREAM about having serious knife skills. It would sure make cooking a whole lot easier. Confession: sometimes I buy the already chopped up veggies because I just don’t feel like taking FOREVER to chop them up for dinner…
Hahaha that’s a good confession! But hey — that’s better than skipping the veggies altogether, right? 🙂