I Know I’m Not The Only One

We’ve all heard the song (which you should definitely play while you read this post):

And since the #1 romance I have in my life is food, I figured I’d share my take:

I know I’m not the only one…

Who Doesn’t Like To Share Food

joey

If I spend an hour making dinner after you’ve heated up your Ramen noodles, NO, you can’t have a bite. No, no, nope. Just, no.

Who studies menus online

I always look at menus before I go to a new restaurant so I don’t panic about all the choices once I’m there. Because heaven forbid I pick a dish that didn’t get rave Yelp reviews.

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Who wants to get just drunk enough to press “Purchase” on a $300 dutch oven from Sur La Table

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But…but…but…they’re just so beautiful. And think how many roux I can make with it.

Who completely understands food wrath

I think I’m the only one who has true empathy for Ross in the Friends episode when someone “accidentally” eats his sandwich. If someone ate my sandwich out of the work fridge, I would totally go Kanye West on them.

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Who has a deep-rooted desire to have serious knife skills

Because being able to cook isn’t enough. I want to prep like an Iron Chef.

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Who can’t eat salad in the winter

I can’t remember the last time I ordered a salad. I love veggies — but a cold entree? Not gonna happen in the months of December-March. It’s just not.

Here’s the way I see it: salads need a blanket in the middle of winter just as much as I do. Therefore the burrito was born.

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And it was good.

Who has a growing addiction to food porn

Are there programs for this? Between Pinterest, Instagram, and now Food Network news on Snapchat, getting basic daily tasks done has taken a backseat. Fine, I’ll say it: food is sexy.

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I know I’m not the only one. ……Right?

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48 comments

  1. Ha ha! I love this post. First off let me say I love the song and video. Second I don’t mind sharing food( I think am the only one), I don’t eat salads in the winter either. Third I think food is sexy too, I’m with ya. Oh about you going kanye west if someone steals your lunch at work…hilarious! ( I would have laughed out loud but I kids are sleeping and definitely do not want to wake them up). 🙂

  2. Hahaha. Salads in Winter are like punishment. Unless it;s a lettuce less salad and comprised of steak and potatoes.

    Whenever I see friends/have meals out with them, I’m the annoying one who makes them all try something if it’s really good…or if they are over, chase them around the house with it to taste. Must be the Persian roots!

    1. Salad punishment! So true!

      Ok — if I’m with other foodies then I’m totally fine sharing, because it’s a give and take. But so many times people are jealous of what I make and then they want some. They don’t wanna work for good food 😉

  3. You are definitely not the only one! I study menus intensely before I visit a restaurant and pretty much am ready to order immediately! And- yes on the knife skills! I saw an online class for the skills I’ve been meaning to do… one of these days!

  4. haha this cracked me up. the un-foodie in me definitely can’t relate, but i love that you love food so much! i do like a good skinny chicken burrito, but i can’t give up the salads. i DO, however, check menus online before i go anywhere, because i’m always the picky one. but i love to share my food! weird, i know. i’m usually pushing it at everyone.

    1. That seems to be the most popular habit — we’re all menu-studiers, apparently! And I don’t mind sharing food with other foodies but when I spend time making something, I put together a nice bowl/plate of it, and then sit down and am asked to share, NOPE!

  5. I really don’t like to share food, even with my husband (he inevitably gets more of it than me because he eats faster). Its just uncomfortable because you have to worry about if you have eaten more than your allotted amount.
    And YES to studying menus online! Its way better to be prepared when going out to eat, otherwise it would take me hours to decide at the restaurant.

  6. I always want salad, but in the winter I am definitely more of a warm soup/veggie person. That being said, I just bought a salad on the way home. Im going to force myself to eat it.

    My knife skills used to be atrocious but now I would say they are mediocre. Blue Apron actually helped improve mine bc they require a lot of chopping to prep the meal.

  7. OMG I say the same thing about wraps! My friend made a great salad the other day and I asked her to make it for me…and then I wrapped it in a tortilla. She thought I was nuts…I asked her for some guacamole! 🙂

  8. Oh you are brilliant, Lauren. You really do come up with witty and great blog posts! I feel ya on the studying of the menus before you go out to eat. Especially if it’s a new restaurant. I look up pictures of dishes from the restaurant as well just to get an idea of portion sizes and know what kinds of foods I’m looking at….Yeah. I know I’m not the only one.

    Oh, and I don’t order salads out at restaurants during colder months either! I do eat them at home. But that’s only because I keep my home nice and toasty, so I feel alright eating them.

  9. Hell no you’re not the only one!! I stared at that chocolate chip cookie image for like 30 seconds hahaha I usually look at restaurant menus beforehand too, I love that episode of Friends (and have been watching old episodes at midnight a lot!), and also think that those ovens are so cute… though I’d have to be pretty drunk to drop $300 on one!

    1. It’s mesmerizing, isn’t it? 🙂 Yeah I wonder how many glasses of wine I’ll have to have to purchase that pot…maybe I’ll start a fund? Put $20 a week into a jar until I have enough? haha. Or maybe I’ll just check out Overstock.com…….

  10. I am with you on them all, apart from salads. Yup I am still eating salads in the cold! I have no desire for smoothies at the moment though – cold liquids make me freeze!
    David has actually had to say to someone before ‘Jen doesn’t share food’! :-S

  11. I LOVE FOOD!! I do I do I doooo!!! 🙂 I always look at menus before going to a restaurant!! I’m like obsessed with traveling and eating!! So fun to find hidden treasures!!! Yaaay you rock and I love that you love food!! Miss ya! XOXO

    1. Mac and cheese is so sexy, right? I have a video on my phone of a mac and cheese casserole bubbling straight from the oven, and anytime I’m in a bad mood I can just watch it. Genius. I highly recommend it.

  12. I study menus online all the time before I go out to eat. I have to know what I want ahead of time! lol…otherwise, yes it takes me forever to make a decision.
    Also, I can only DREAM about having serious knife skills. It would sure make cooking a whole lot easier. Confession: sometimes I buy the already chopped up veggies because I just don’t feel like taking FOREVER to chop them up for dinner…

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