1. You now have 800 different usernames and password combinations. Good luck keeping up with them.
That one’s for you, Dad 🙂
2. You gain a few pounds out of nowhere. You don’t look any different, but it’s like increasing age + life experience=weight. It would probably be a lot easier if we lived in a world that was more like this:
But I digress…
3. Coffee is no longer a way to look cool and studious. It is a drug. Without it, functioning is questionable and once you finally get it, it’s like a veil is lifted and the whole day starts to look up.
4. There is no need to read a book. Ever. It’s tough for me to sit down and read so I really appreciated that part of school when I was younger. Now there’s nothing stopping me from never touching a book for the rest of my life.
5. Serving sizes are getting increasingly smaller. I’m not getting any bigger but 3/4 a cup of cereal now seems like even more of a joke than it did a few years ago. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve wanted to pull a Jason Segel in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and put cereal in a mixing bowl. Now THAT’S a serving.
6. Your friends all start to live in different places and have different lives. So when you manage to come up with one night a week when you aren’t busy, how do you choose who to see, where to go, what to do? Oh, and the thought of making NEW friends? Ha!
7. Staying up past midnight, unless you’re watching Netflix, means that the next day you will be fully incapacitated. You go from dreaming of this every weekend in college:
To having only two priorities once you get off work:
8. You have very little hope for the next generation.
And just saying that makes you feel like you’re 82 instead of 22.
9. You start to search the hell out of Pinterest wedding ideas even though you haven’t even started paying off your student loans yet and can’t even commit to a movie selection on a Friday night.
10. Coupons matter.